How many are you guilty of? The café stop, the filthy bike, the filthier socks, the gloat, the POV, the pedal scrap injury and many more.

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1. The café or pub stop

Helmets and handbags (Camelbaks) on tables. Coffees and cakes if it’s a mid-ride stop. Beers and crisps if it’s a post-ride scene.

2. The filth

Sometimes your mountain bike’s wheels can barely turn in the frame due to the amount of mud sticking to them. But before you get busy with the cleaning stick, you get your phone out and get the scene up on to Insta first.

4. The gloat

Sunny weather. Buff trails. Blue skies. Delicious singletrack. Bonus points if it’s a photo taken while all your riding mates are stuck at work or at home doing some DIY.

5. Worn out disc pads

Be honest, how often do you look at your brake pads? Chances are, not until it’s too late. The best examples of pad neglect are very worthy of social media sharing/shaming.

6. The POV

The cycling-along-selfie. Very popular amongst road cyclists but also common enough amongst the mountain biking ‘Grammers to warrant inclusion in this list. We can’t help but wonder how many crashes (and broken phones) have been caused by attempting to take one of these..?

7. Strava screengrab

Not content with having their Strava performance displayed on Strava, some riders (ahem) even go to the ridiculous extent of screenshotting it for Instagram. See also: slightly out of focus (too) close-up pic of a Garmin with some sort of significant stats displayed upon it.

8. #socklines

Socklines and cycling is more usually of the tanline type. But not when it’s British mountain bikers. This is all about the filth, again. Bonus points for video of cycling shoes leaking water when squeezed.

9. #BAAW

Bike Against A Wall. 258,560 tagged posts and climbing.

10. Bike aloft at summit

Irresistible yet always ill-advised. Somehow makes any summit-ing achievement look like a Duke of Edinburgh daytrip.

11. Injuries

We’ve spared you the gorey examples (see our infamous ‘Riders Who Should Know Better’ gruesome gallery in the magazine if you like that sort of thing. Classic example above: flat pedal pin scrapes up the back of a leg.

12. Retail therapy

Brown paper packages tied up with string and all that. Who doesn’t love it when something arrives in the post (perhaps inspired by our Dirty Deals round-ups) or at our local bike shop? It already makes us want it to be the weekend so we can go and try it out.

Any we’ve missed?

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