Why 9 years old? Coz it'll make sure they're clean for a start and some of the silly jokes really crack me up still.
So my opener..
When at an Indian restaurant tell them your going to order the Chicken Tarka, it's like a korma but Otter!!
LOL, I kill myself sometimes!!
Why is Lady Q looking at me like that???
WHA......
I was a teenage werewolf!
andifalloffwithstyle!!!!!!
FEED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
here is one my sister loves:
Why are cooks cruel??
Because the whip cream and beat eggs!!!!
Caution this b**ch bites!!!!
After ten loyal years working for the local factory , Nigel & Trevor are laid off, so first thing monday morning they made there way to the DSS. When asked his occupation , Nigel said " I'm a panty stitcher , I sew the elastic into cotton knickers."
The clerk looked up 'panty stitcher' and, finding it to be classed as unskilled labour,gave Nigel £100 a week benefit money.
Trevor then approached the counter and explained he was a diesel fitter , as diesel fitting was classed as a skilled job Trevor was awarded £200 per week.
When Nigel learned how much Trev was getting he was furious and stormed back into the DSS office and up to the clerk demanding to know why.
"It say on my list that diesel fitters are an intrinsic part of the skilled labour force" explained the clerk.
"WHAT SKILL ?" screamed Nigel "I sew in the elastic, he pulls the knickers on and says 'Yup - diesel fitter !!' "
I like to ride my bicycle.....I like to ride my bike...... Blah Blah Blah
ha thats class
Caution this b**ch bites!!!!
Two men were out riding on their favourite local trail when they spot a funeral procession going over a bridge ahead. One of the men takes off his helmet and solemnly holds it to his heart.
'That was a nice gesture',says the other man
'Oh',replies the first 'its the least I can do, We were married for 25 years after all.'
I like to ride my bicycle.....I like to ride my bike...... Blah Blah Blah
Oh yes!!
April and I were lying in bed the other day. My hands were slowly finding their way across her body. I whispered, "I'm gonna make you the happiest woman in the world." She whispered back, "I'll miss you."
Caution this b**ch bites!!!!
Two campers are hiking in the woods when one is bitten on the rear end by a rattlesnake. “I’ll go into town for a doctor,” the other says. He runs ten miles to a small town and finds the town’s only doctor, who is delivering a baby. “I can’t leave,” the doctor says. ‘But here’s what to do. Take a knife, cut a little X where the bite is, suck out the poison and spit it on the ground.” The guy ruins back to his friend, who is in agony. ‘What did the doctor say?” the victim asks. “He says you’re gonna die.”
Caution this b**ch bites!!!!
Two Parrots are sitting on a perch,
One says to the other 'Can you smell fish ?'
I like to ride my bicycle.....I like to ride my bike...... Blah Blah Blah
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