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Thread: Encouraging Bonce Potty Use

  1. #1
    Senior Member Fartblood's Avatar
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    Encouraging Bonce Potty Use

    We all like helmets. They protect us. They are good.

    But many people have so little regard and respect for themselves that they dont bother.

    So I'm thinking of an advertising campaign, a catchy strapline to get them wearing the bone dome. Something like...

    "Oi, you, ballbag - you look like a right penis with no helmet on"

    I'm thinking I'll have the nation wearing Giro's within a few weeks, so now is a good time to buy shares
    Fartblood All Terrain Cycles
    Making the Stain worth the Pain since 1969

  2. #2
    Senior Member MTBLeague's Avatar
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    "What's your head worth?"

    also head replacable with looks, teeth or brain.

    If its only worth a tenner, then spend at least that, if you are worth nothing................

  3. #3
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    I like your catchy slogan, but feel it might not work with some people as they are just thick, stupid and no common sense.

    But hey good luck with your campaign, will stock up on shares as soon as stockbrokers open in the morning, expecting tomorrow footsie index to go through the roof !!
    Don't be afraid of no Ghosts !

  4. #4
    Senior Member NorthernMatt's Avatar
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    Do you want to spend the rest of your life in a pool of your own vomit, piss, shit, and dribble?

    Thought not. Put a helmet on you pillock.

  5. #5
    Senior Member Gunwitch's Avatar
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    This is my philosophy:

    "I may look a twat in a helmet, but not as much of a twat with my brains spilling over the road"

    I get the piss taken out of me for wearing my protective gear by some guys and that's what i say.
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  6. #6
    Senior Member Fartblood's Avatar
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    Some bloody good ideas.

    The Missus suggested "Oi, eunuch, slap on a skid lid or you'll be a virgin forever"

    You know, I didn't realise we had so much marketing talent on the forum.
    Fartblood All Terrain Cycles
    Making the Stain worth the Pain since 1969

  7. #7
    Senior Member fredmundo's Avatar
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    The only problem with that one is that the target audience won't understand the word eunuch...... or read it correctly..

    how about you nook instead?!
    "Duct tape is like the force: It has a dark side and a light side and it holds the universe together."- Carl Zwanzig

  8. #8
    Senior Member DaMilkyBarKid's Avatar
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    You could do a poster campaign in the vein of a lonely hearts ad:

    "Mrs Giro (or any other brand) WLTM outdoorsy type for fun and games.
    Likes to get down and dirty in any weather, at any time.
    Promises to take really good care of you.

    Reply Code: LBS"

    Add a suitable piccie and you could do a series of them.
    Rides: Boardman Hybrid Comp, TBC and err, that's it!

  9. #9
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    How about "Oi fuckter, want to be even more braindead???"

    Seconded gun, for most rides I now wear a set of 661 Kyle Straits as they are super comfy and I always seem to land on my knees! Better to be safe than sorry, I don't even notice I'm wearing them now!
    "Those who think they know it all but don't really annoy those of us who do"

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  10. #10
    Senior Member EnglishLion's Avatar
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    Or

    "Public Information Notice:

    Due to NHS cuts, head injuries from cyclists not wearing helmets will now be treated with termination."

    If this were implemented as advertised then the gene pool would be improved at the same time as increasing helmet wearing!

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